


No Control (Now You Know)

by ishipallthings



Category: Avengers Assemble (Cartoon), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Accidental Love Confessions, Fluff, Getting Together, Love Confessions, M/M, Misunderstandings, Mutual Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-27
Updated: 2018-12-27
Packaged: 2019-09-28 12:59:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,581
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17183435
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ishipallthings/pseuds/ishipallthings
Summary: In which Tony overhears something he's really not supposed to.





	No Control (Now You Know)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [shieldmaidenofrohan](https://archiveofourown.org/users/shieldmaidenofrohan/gifts).



> This is an edited version of a tumblr ficlet I wrote for captainstarkreportingforduty over a year ago, I figured it wouldn't hurt to post this on AO3, if only for archiving purposes. 
> 
> I've realized sappy love confessions and Steve and Nat talking about his feelings is something I really like to write, so if you're not tired of the trope, I hope you like it. I am very predictable.
> 
> Unbetaed, so mistakes are all mine.
> 
> Title is from Hilary Duff's "Now You Know".

“You’re gonna have to talk to him sooner or later, you know?”

Looking up, Steve acknowledges Nat’s entrance with a nod before looking back down at his sketchbook with a sigh. He gravitates towards drawing as a way to express his feelings whenever he gets upset, and today is no exception. Except this time the subject of this particular sketch is also the reason for his bad mood, and that isn’t helping at all.

“He’s just gonna take what I say the wrong way and we’ll end up fighting again.” 

Nat approaches the couch, nudging Steve aside to make space for herself. 

“Well, considering you accused him of being a thoughtless adrenaline junkie, I’m not sure how else you wanted him to take that. Rhodey says he’s been in the workshop for two days.”

Steve sighs again and buries his face in his hands, fighting back the urge to march down to Tony’s workshop and check on him. Two days isn’t even close to the longest amount of time he could spend absorbed in a project, but he usually has Steve or Rhodey to remind him that food was something he needed to function properly. This time he had ordered JARVIS to lock them out.

“I know! I just - you know I didn’t mean it like that, Nat.” 

“Of course you didn’t, but Tony can’t see that. When you yell at him for being stupid and reckless enough to take a shot for you, it’s because you love him, and you can’t stand to see him hurt, especially because of you.” Nat pauses for a moment, biting her lip. 

“But what he hears is that you think he’s irresponsible and too reckless to be a team player. It’s Tony, so of course he’s going to lash out.”

Steve shakes his head, placing his sketchbook down on the table in front of him. “I fucked up Nat. He’s cares so much about everyone on this team and he tries so hard to help people because he still can’t see how much of a goddamn hero he is, and then I go off and accuse him of risking people’s lives for his own enjoyment. I just - I can’t stand it whenever he throws himself in harm’s way for my sake, not when the serum can take it.” 

He swallows. “Not when he means everything to me.” Even though he’s admitted it to himself for a while now, Steve feels his heart quicken at saying the words out loud.

“Wow. You finally said it. Steve Rogers everyone, finally back from his swim in the Nile.” Nat smiles at Steve, nudging playfully at his shoulder. “It’s about time. Clint said it would take you another month.” 

He gives a soft, helpless laugh in response. “I knew, I just didn’t want to say it, because that would make it real. And if it’s real that means I have to tell him. And that’s a completely different thing, telling him - I couldn’t live with wrecking our friendship over this.”

Natasha meets his eyes with a considering look, and Steve tries to not to fidget under her steady gaze. “And how is this any better, Steve? Blowing up at him because you’re too afraid to tell him how you feel, pushing him away when you feel too much at the thought that he might get hurt, only to hurt him in the process?” 

“I know, and I hate that I’ve hurt him.” Remembering the stunned look of hurt on Tony’s face at his words, Steve’s heart gives a painful thud. “But I also hate how he doesn’t understand how much we need him with us, that he thinks him getting hurt is acceptable collateral damage.”

“I know Steve, he’s important to me too. But maybe,” Nat arches an eyebrow, placing emphasis on that last word “yelling at him isn’t the best way to show him that. Being honest about why you’re scared might be a good first step.” 

Steve lets out a breath, fists clenched at his sides in frustration. “Well, what the hell am I supposed to say, Nat? ‘Tony, I’m so sorry I yelled at you for being reckless, the truth is the mere thought of you getting hurt in my place tears me up inside because I’m stupidly head over heels in love with you, and have been for months?’ Like that would -”

A loud clatter interrupts his speech and Steve looks up to find Tony staring at him, mouth open in astonishment. His kitten coffee mug is forgotten, shattered in pieces across the floor as he fixes his eyes on Steve.

“Steve—” Tony starts to speak, but Steve is up in an instant, fleeing from the room in a dead run, ignoring both Tony and Nat calling after him. His breath comes in short panicked breaths as his world compresses down to an overwhelming feeling of sickening, swamping dread. Tony knows.

It’s all out in the open now – no more pretending that the sight of Tony half-asleep and incoherent before coffee every morning doesn’t send his heart fluttering, no more soaking in Tony’s warmth at innocent friendly touches but at the same time dreaming of more, no more biting down a flood of jealousy at the sight of Tony charming investors at a charity gala and wishing he could get up the courage to ask him to dance… Tony knew, and it was all over now.

Finally reaching his room, Steve slams the door behind him before tossing out a hurried command for JARVIS to block any incoming calls or visitors. He sinks to the floor, heartsore and angry at himself. He should have been more careful, should have never said it out loud... Steve has always known Tony would never feel the same way about him, even if the others seem to feel differently, but the look of utter shock on his face when he heard Steve’s words is almost too much to bear. It was as though Tony had never even considered Steve as a romantic possibility, and now he knew about Steve’s feelings. He had ruined things between them before he had even gotten a chance to apologize.

Suddenly, he hears a frantic knock on his door. “Steve? Steve - it’s me.” Oh god, just when he thought things couldn’t get any worse. 

He knows Tony’s here either to offer him comfort before having the “I just want to be friends talk”, or worse, to break off their friendship entirely, and right now, Steve’s not ready for either conversation.

“Tony, I just – I just need to be alone for a while. It’s fine.” It is absolutely, extremely not fine, but it’s not like Steve could open his eyes and suddenly wake up in an alternate universe where Tony returned his feelings instead of being horrified, so he doesn’t really have any other options. He hopes it’s enough to get Tony to go away for now, but knowing him, it’s probably useless.

“No... Steve, you don’t understand, I -” Steve sighs loudly, wanting nothing more than to sink to the floor and shut out the whole world. Pretending like his heart hasn’t been crushed by Tony’s rejection isn’t going to be fun, but it’s not Tony’s fault, and he knows that making Tony feel guilty about his feelings is just going to make their friendship harder to salvage in the long run. It doesn’t mean he likes the idea of putting on a brave face about it. 

Standing up, Steve brushes a hand over his face, hoping he doesn’t look as much of a mess like he feels. Steeling himself, he reaches a hand out to open the door when he hears Tony’s voice again from the other side of the door.

“Steve, I’m in love with you too. I’m sorry I froze just now, I just didn’t expect it, I never imagined you would feel the same and I thought -“

 _I’m in love with you too._ A flood of joy fills Steve from head to toe at Tony’s words, even as a small part of him wonders if he’s dreaming. He’s never felt this warm since the ice. 

Pushing the door open, his eyes meet Tony for a long moment. The silence stretches out between them, a bridge both of them are wondering if they should cross. 

Steve breaks it with a quiet “you love me?”, watching as the nervousness on Tony’s face is replaced firm determination. His heart leaps at the sight, a flare of hope growing in his chest. His voice sounds wobbly and disbelieving even to his own ears, but when Tony nods carefully and steps closer into his space, Steve can’t bring himself to care at all. 

“Yeah, I do.” Tony reaches out and tangles their fingers together after a brief moment of hesitation, sending a curl of warmth through Steve’s stomach. This is real. He gets to have this. 

Tony takes another step forward, and then he’s in Steve’s arms, warm and wonderful, and Steve knows he belongs there forever. 

After a moment, Tony looks up at him. “Steve, what you said before, about the thought of me being hurt because of you tearing you up inside? That’s how I feel whenever you get hurt, so I’m not gonna apologize for taking a hit for you when I can.” 

Steve smiles at his words, pulling Tony impossibly close. “And why is that?”

He is rewarded with a beaming smile and Tony’s bright laughter. “Because I love you, jerk.”

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and kudos make my day (hell, my week!) <3
> 
> Subscribe if you want more Steve/Tony - I'm hoping to write more for comm prompts, and my Holiday Exchange fic will be revealed soon, and come find me at ishipallthings on tumblr or twitter if you want to yell about these two idiots in love, I'm always up for that!


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